Never too late

I received a postcard. A cute one from Tunisia written Tunisie....(maybe that's how Tunisians pronounced it), with small great photos in it. Most probably displaying some of the interesting things about Tunisia.

I was not surprised when I received the postcard. As usual it was adressed to MAK & FAMILY. Sounds Chinese...? Well...let it be. I am the "Mak"....She usually sends one postcard whenever she went somewhere. I will keep them in an album as a memoir.

What instantly strikes my mind is why did the postcard came so late. A month late judging by the postal chop. Was it the postal blunder, backlog or.....or is email and internet has taken over the job of relaying news. While I do not deny the efficiency of the internet, I will always feel very nice and happy whenever I received a mail, a postcard with good news of course...!

I personally feel that postcards is are things of the past since they are hard to find and they are not up to date. I remembered the difficulty of finding one when I went to Thailand. When they are one of the usual things in bookstalls, they are scarce now.

I still like to see them even if they are a little expensive now. And I will buy them whenever I came across them in some of my travel.

By the way thank you for the Tunisie postcard. A nice one.

Just wish that it had never happened........

At a gathering in one of the neighbor's house there were a lot of hush hush. Since I normally avoid gossips, this one was really new to me.

"What? You really don't know?" asked one.

I shrugged. Yes....I don't know. Is this the latest gossip?

"You don't read the papers?"

Again. Oh I hate to read the papers nowadays. Full of rubbish. They're all
only good for the paper lama man....

"No wonder...."

Well......... I do not mind not knowing the latest gossip. I'd prefer not to know if it isn't something nice to hear.

"Hmm.....it happened about 2 weeks ago...bla...bla...bla..."

Oh...oh... how I was glad not to know.....but since now I knew, I feel saddened by the incident.

I don't know whether to feel sorry or angry....

kaleidoscope

When I decided to blog about two years ago I was not sure what I would get. Someone told to go on and write something, nobody cares as long as you do not abuse the principles of blogging.
Nobody really knows who you are unless you want to make yourself known....

Oooh? I never want to be popular. That is not what I want. I thought I want to share something, maybe some knowledge. So I end up with this Kaleidoscope. Sounds jargon? No...it was just a name that I remembered when my class decided to publish something. It was named Kaleidoscope. Then we worked hard to produce our first publication. Almost everybody contributed. Alas....that was the only one....no more 'cos after that everybody became busy with school, homeworks, and eventually our major exams. I never really stop writing, not professionally though....most left unfinished. Some I did sent to my college's weekly tabloid. It was fun when you write under pseudoname......

So Kaleidoscope to me never die a premature death. It is here with me....

When women gossip....

One of my colleague, Az asked one day, after we had finished our lunch.

"Is it true what I heard someone said...."

I knew she genuinely asked for an explanation not a denial from me.
I stared back at. I was just sitting there reading some nasty, horrible juicy news in a paper, a tabloid.

"What is true and what did you hear?" I retorted.

"Ooh...something about you..."

"Who said what?" I asked again.

She blushed, trying to look innocent. "From S*****. During the recent seminar....she said... I just listen."

Feeling angry, I snapped at her. "Oh that's what you people do during seminars? Gossiping? You never listen to what is being discussed in the seminar?"

She was taken aback at mt response. "I just listen to what she said...." she kind of retaliate...

"Goodness gracious.....do you people had nothing better to do?" I said slowly.

Az did not answer. She said she is sorry.

"There are a lot of other things to do, instead of gossiping, telling all sorts of stories. In the end we don't know what is true and what is not. They are better kept aside." I said.

Az agreed.

"Why don't we talk about how good someone's children are, how could we emulate them."

Az was quiet. I did not know whether she agreed with me or not. The question was left unanswered. I chose not to enlighten her query. I knew it will eventually travel very far.....far beyond your imagination. I let it rest at that and I never really care to react.

I was relieved that I had had my lunch. That kind of thing sure kill my appetite.....

I am a woman and I do not like to hear negative things about another woman. So I hope the others do....if you happen to hear some gossips(which of course, not necessarily true....) for God's sake never tell others even though she is your best friend....

You don't know what happen next....

When things go bad....

Inna lillahi wa inna Ilaihi raji'un...

A friend had just passed away. I knew about it two days after from another friend of mine. He was not a close friend but he had worked in the same office but in a different unit. He was hardworking, dedicated and full of energy. But working in HQ did not seem to suit him so he asked for a transfer. He was back to his old place, working with those who knew him well.

He was only 49, married with four kids, the youngest is just four years old. That was the extra information I get from another friend.

"How did he die?"

"He went with a friend for a morning coffee. He complained of chest pains and collapsed. Maybe he had a seizure or something like that. They sent him to hospital...well, that's it..."

A heart failure. Quite common these days.

"Life will have to go on...." I said.

"Yes...."

Yesterday I heard some bad news too. One of my neighbor had been warded in ICU.

I hope he make it through.

Now I feel that I should go for full medical check-up again.

Sigh...........

My friend...a friend in need is a friend indeed....

"It never occur to me ....that such thing could ever happen to me..." Often I hear a statement like that.
Well...who does? It is always the least expected. But it did happen.

"He is cheating behind my back..."
Most certainly....obviously....nobody will cheat in front of you. Somehow someone who cheats will always try not to let others know...

I remember that day.......


It was hot afternoon and it was Ramadhan. I was driving alone... cruising at just about 30 - 40 km/hr, looking for her. I had been doing that for weeks, almost a month now. I knew I could finally meet up with her one day. God willing....

I had been passing through the same rows of the same houses repeatedly day in day out. I just did not know where to go any more. The neighborhood seemed quite, perhaps they took their afternoon nap....or mostly might be still at work.

But that did not dampen my spirit.

I kept searching for her. I must not gave up hope. I only knew her name, her house but I had almost forgotten how she look like. Truly, I met her once. Yes, only once and that was a year ago.
no contact number, I did not feel it was necessary back then.

A few days earlier I went to her new temporarily rented house but it was empty. I didn't know whether it was her house...but she lived around there. No car in the driveway. All I got was some curious stares from her neighbors. I gave them a smile, get back to my old sedan and drove off.

That day was one of my lucky day. As I passed by her own house which was under major renovation, I saw a car. I thought it must be her car. I stopped and parked my car under a small tree quite a distance away. As I walked towards the house, I saw a woman coming out of the wide open gate and was about to unlock her car door.

"Amy...." I called out.

She startled and looked into my direction.

"Amy..."

"Yes....?"

"Oh thank God..." What a relief....

"Who are you....?"

I extended my hand. "We have met before...I don't know whether you remember me. I have been looking for you..." I said, ignoring her question. "Let's go somewhere. I want to talk to you....."

And I told her everything....just about everything.

"I don't care whether you believe me or not. But I believe in what I saw..." I sighed, holding back my tears. I remembered, it was the holy month. I should not be crying.

She looked dejected....sad and angry.

That was the beginning of a friendship and sharing the misfortune and agony. Many, many years had passed....the ugly feeling is still there, haunting me.

I know. I feel awful.

Astaghfirullah.....