Jatuh

"Saat pertemuan pertama itu memang aku amat nantikan. Aku ingin melihat wajahnya di alam nyata, mengharap dia memang wujud, walaupun sudah beberapa kali mendengar suaranya. Namun pertemuan dan bual bicara yang sebentar cuma itu menjadi satu peristiwa yang tak dapat aku lupakan. Aku menyesali pertemuan itu kerana saat aku pandang wajahnya aku tergolek-golek jatuh cinta. 

Suatu perasaan yang ingin aku nyahkan tapi tidak berdaya." 

Love is a beautiful feeling. It should be mutual, shared and appreciated. Then it will be meaningful. Sometimes I do wonder why the feelings of love for someone who is in a different time zone, in a different world and who I hardly met is present. It is there all the time. Yeah, I strongly believe that it should be made known, should be displayed and shown and the name be remembered days and nights. Subhanallah. It is awesome. I love you sincerely, unconditionally. Full stop.

5 Surprising Signs of an Unhealthy Heart



By Melanie Haiken, Caring.com
Fri, Jun 24, 2011(from Yahoo Health)
We've all read the signs of a heart attack listed on posters in the hospital waiting room. But what if there were other, earlier signs that could alert you ahead of time that your heart was in trouble?
It turns out there are. Researchers have done a lot of work in recent years looking at the signs and symptoms patients experienced in the months or even years leading up to a heart attack. "The heart, together with the arteries that feed it, is one big muscle, and when it starts to fail the symptoms can show up in many parts of the body," says cardiologist Jonathan Goldstein of St. Michael's Medical Center in Newark, New Jersey. Here are five surprising clues that your heart needs checking out. Any of these signs -- and particularly two or more together -- is reason to call your doctor for a workup, says Goldstein.
1. Neck pain
Feel like you pulled a muscle in the side of your neck? Think again, especially if it doesn't go away. Post-heart attack, some patients remember noticing that their neck hurt and felt tight, a symptom they attributed at the time to muscle strain. People commonly miss this symptom because they expect the more dramatic acute pain and numbness in the chest, shoulder, and arm. Women in particular are less likely to experience heart pain that way, and more likely to feel twinges of pain and a sensation of tightness running along the shoulder and down the neck, says Margie Latrella, an advanced practice nurse in the Women's Cardiology Center in New Jersey and coauthor of Take Charge: A Woman's Guide to a Healthier Heart (Dog Ear, 2009). The pain might also extend down the left side of the body, into the left shoulder and arm.

Why it happens:

Nerves from damaged heart tissue send pain signals up and down the spinal cord to junctures with nerves that extend out into the neck and shoulder.

What distinguishes it:

The pain feels like it's radiating out in a line, rather than located in one very specific spot. And it doesn't go away with ice, heat, or muscle massage.
2. Sexual problems
Having trouble achieving or keeping erections is common in men with coronary artery disease, but they may not make the connection. One survey of European men being treated for cardiovascular disease found that two out of three had suffered from erectile dysfunction for months or years before they were diagnosed with heart trouble. Recent studies on the connection between ED and cardiovascular disease have been so convincing that doctors now consider it the standard of care to do a full cardiovascular workup when a man comes in complaining of ED, according to cardiologist Goldstein says. "In recent years there's been pretty clear evidence that there's a substantially increased risk of heart attack and death in patients with erectile dysfunction," Goldstein says.

Why it happens:

Just as arteries around the heart can narrow and harden, so can those that supply the penis. And because those arteries are smaller, they tend to show damage much sooner -- as much as three to four years before the disease would otherwise be detected.

What distinguishes it:

In this case, the cause isn't going to be immediately distinguishable. If you or your partner has problems getting or maintaining an erection, that's reason enough to visit your doctor to investigate cardiovascular disease as an underlying cause. "Today, any patient who comes in with ED is considered a cardiovascular patient until proven otherwise," says Goldstein.
3. Dizziness, faintness, or shortness of breath
More than 40 percent of women in one study published in Circulation: Journal of the American Heart Association, reported having experienced shortness of breath in the days before a heart attack. You might feel like you can't breathe, or you might feel dizzy or faint, as you would at high altitude. If you can't catch your breath while walking upstairs, vacuuming, weeding the garden, or doing other activities that previously caused you no trouble, this is a reason to be on the alert.

Why it happens:

Not enough blood is getting through the arteries to carry sufficient oxygen to the heart. The heart muscle pain of angina may also make it hurt to draw a deep breath. Coronary artery disease (CAD), in which plaque builds up and blocks the arteries that feed the heart, prevents the heart from getting enough oxygen. The sudden sensation of not being able to take a deep breath is often the first sign of angina, a type of heart muscle pain.

What distinguishes it:

If shortness of breath is caused by lung disease, it usually comes on gradually as lung tissue is damaged by smoking or environmental factors. If heart or cardiovascular disease is the cause, the shortness of breath may come on much more suddenly with exertion and will go away when you rest.


4. Indigestion, nausea, or heartburn
Although most of us expect pain from any condition related to the heart to occur in the chest, it may actually occur in the abdomen instead. Some people, particularly women, experience the pain as heartburn or a sensation of over-fullness and choking. A bout of severe indigestion and nausea can be an early sign of heart attack, or myocardial infarction, particularly in women. In one study, women were more than twice as likely as men to experience vomiting, nausea, and indigestion for several months leading up to a heart attack.

Why it happens:

Blockages of fatty deposits in an artery can reduce or cut off the blood supply to the heart, causing what feels like tightness, squeezing, or pain -- most typically in the chest but sometimes in the abdomen instead. Depending on which part of your heart is affected, it sends pain signals lower into the body. Nausea and light-headedness can also be signs that a heart attack is in progress, so call your doctor right away if the feeling persists.

What distinguishes it:

Like all types of angina, the abdominal pain associated with a heart problem is likely to worsen with exertion and get better with rest. Also, you're likely to experience repeated episodes, rather than one prolonged episode as you would with normal indigestion or food poisoning.
5. Jaw and ear pain
Ongoing jaw pain is one of those mysterious and nagging symptoms that can have several causes but can sometimes be a clue to coronary artery disease (CAD) and impending heart attack. The pain may travel along the jaw all the way to the ear, and it can be hard to determine which it's coming from, says cardiovascular nurse Margie Latrella. This is a symptom doctors have only recently begun to focus on, because many patients surveyed post-heart attack report that this is one of the only symptoms they noticed in the days and weeks leading up to the attack.

Why it happens:

Damaged heart tissue sends pain signals up and down the spinal cord to junctures with nerves that radiate from the cervical vertebrae out along the jaw and up to the ear.

What distinguishes it:

Unlike the jaw pain caused by temporomandibular joint disorder (TMJ), tooth pain, or ear infection, the pain doesn't feel like it's in one isolated spot but rather like it's radiating outward in a line. The pain may extend down to the shoulder and arm -- particularly on the left side, and treatments such as massage, ice, and heat don't affect it.



symptoms, siti payung, heart attack

Dah lebih dua tahun rupanya blog ini tidak di update. Mujur tidak berhantu. Kalau tidak entahlah..... 

Aku masih ingat sewaktu aku sibuk bekerja dulu, aku tak ada masa untuk berblog. Dalam hatiku ada terselit semangat yang berkobar-kobar untuk menulis di dalam sebuah blog milikku sendiri. Macam2 angan2ku ketika itu. Nak tulis cerita, nak tulis pengalaman, nak kongsi maklumat.

"Tulislah, bukan orang tahu siapa kita kalau tak mahu orang kenal." saran anakku yang memang amat rajin menulis dan membaca. Katanya ianya bermula dari Friendster....lepas tu, blogspot dan sekarang di dalam wordpress. Selalu juga aku mengikuti hasil tulisannya.

Aku pernah pergi ke sekolah lamanya dan memberikan dua buah buku yang di dalamnya ada hasil tulisannya. Sebuah sajak pendek yang menyentuh perasaanku. 

Pengetua sekolah itu, seorang wanita berkata, "Terima kasih. Kita memang ingin tahu apa yang dah berlaku kepada bekas pelajar sekolah ini. Saya harap dia boleh datang dan memberi nasihat kepada adik2 yang belajar di sini."

"Oh. Saya boleh tanya anak saya, tak tahulah sama ada dia setuju bercakap di depan orang ramai."

"Apa salahnya."

"Ada masalah sikit."

"Apa masalahnya?" 

"Dia tak tinggal di sini. Dia balik sekali sekala, itupun sekejap, dua tiga minggu dalam dua tiga tahun."

"Di mana dia tinggal?"

"Ireland."

"Ambil medic ke?"

Entah kenapa selalu benar orang menganggap Ireland hanya ada bidang perubatan. 

"Tak. Professional Accountant."

"Oh...."

Itu cerita lama. Sudah berlaku beberapa tahun lalu. Ya..... lamanya aku tidak menulis di sini. Aku lebih banyak membaca, kerana nampak gayanya membaca jauh lebih mudah. Menulis, belum tentu ada orang yang akan baca, tambahan kalau gaya tulisan itu membosankan....macam dalam blog ini.

Inilah permulaan semula kepada yang sudah berhenti selama lebih dua tahun. InsyaAllah aku akan menulis lagi, tak kisahlah kalau ada orang baca atau tidak.

Aku sisipkan di sini sebuah foto dari Ireland...... 

Inilah senario yang biasa dilihat, orang ini sedang mencari rezeki dengan membuat 'stunt' di khalayak ramai. Mulanya aku berminat untuk melihat lakonannya. Tak kisahlah kalau bayar sikit. Tapi bila dia kata secara indirect, dia tak mahu terima 1 euro, dua euro....aku give up. Kalau dia tamak aku jadi kedekut...

Entah.......

Tersedu bila terkenang. Ia terpaku di situ dan memori itu tidak akan terpadam sampai bila-bila. Kadang-kadang aku rasa aku ingin melupakan, namun kadang-kadang aku rasa ianya lebih baik jika tidak aku lupakan kerana ia jadi pengajaran walaupun amat pahit untuk dikenang.  Seperti aku menagih simpati dan enjoy kepada rasa 'derita' itu. Tidak, ianya berlaku dan menjadi sejarah. Titik hitam yang besar dan sukar dipadam. Alangkah moleknya jika ianya berwarna warni.....Entah. 


Satu perkara yang aku sedar ialah hilangnya rasa kepercayaan itu. Aku harap aku akan dapat melihat semula wajah kejujuran sebenar yang terpancar. Beberapa ketika dulu aku se akan mahu percaya, namun setiap kali ada saja perkara yang merubahnya. Sehingga aku menjadi tidak percaya. Langsung tidak percaya. Entah skala apa yang aku gunakan 0 - 5, 0 -10, 0 - 100. Entah.


Seorang teman yang boleh aku katakan rapat pernah berkata selepas melalui gelombang besar di dalam rumahtangganya. "No.....I'll never trust him again. and yes, I still love him." Sehingga kini mereka masih suami isteri. Aku harap dia sudah meletakkan kepercayaannya semula di tempatnya. Entah.


Ya...dia pernah aku tanya bluntly. Point blank. Ini kerana aku rasa aku perlu tahu dari mulutnya sendiri bukan dari orang lain tentang dirinya. Dia mengaku ya dan tidak. Lalu dia bercerita dengan sukarela sesuatu yang aku rasa belum pernah aku dengar dari mana2 sumber. Cerita dukanya, tindakannya dan akhirnya bila dia bersujud di hadapan rumah Allah, dia menukar nawaitunya dan menyesali segala2 yang pernah dilakukannya....alangkah syahdunya dan aku dapat merasakan apa yang dia rasa selama ini. Entah.....

 Gambar hiasan

Aku harap akan dapat merasai semula kepercayaan yang sudah nipis itu kerana masa semakin suntuk. Mungkin. Entah. 

Kita memang tidak sempurna dan seharusnya menerima segala kelemahan, kesilapan dan kekurangan itu dengan mambaikinya semampu diri kita dengan harapan tinggi agar begitu juga sebaliknya.....

versus versus

When political view clashes, does it tear the relationship as well? I would not sacrifice mine. Nobody is perfect. Arguments can lead nowhere. It would only jeopardize friendship or whatever it is. Sometimes it is best to leave them aside.

Well.....somebody would say that I don't stand by my principles....Let them be, 'cos it will lead to another argument. I hated arguments especially with the love ones. It will only made myself feel worst inside. The I would just silently pray that the truth will be unfold.

Politic is not everything in this world. There are other things equally important if not more important. I would not trade anything if it involves my faith, my belief and my religion.



In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful. All praise is due to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds. The Beneficent, the Merciful. Master of the Day of Judgment. Thee do we serve and Thee do we beseech for help. Keep us on the right path. The path of those upon whom Thou hast bestowed favors. Not (the path) of those upon whom Thy wrath is brought down, nor of those who go astray.

http://www.alquran-english.com/

There's a place in my mind.....

There is a place in my mind that I had always want to go. And maybe stay for a few weeks. Dublin. I planned to go last July but I couldn't make it. I hope I can go next year.

In the spring of 2010.

I just hope and pray.......

Cymbopogon nardus

I didn't feel good lately. Not exactly 'demam' but kind of feeling lethargic. Then I remembered my Cymbopogon nardus which I cut from the bunch that my hubby wanted to replant. It was almost dried up, maybe the fragrant almost gone. I boiled them in my large pot. The aroma filled my house.

"What are you doing?" my mum asked.

"Ooo...nothing..."

"Smells like air mandi orang dalam pantang..."

Hehehe...I laughed.

Then I took my bath. Ooo I felt so good after the bath. It helped boost my down and out feeling.
Maybe I should do that more often rather than spending my money on spa.....

Sigh....

Never too late

I received a postcard. A cute one from Tunisia written Tunisie....(maybe that's how Tunisians pronounced it), with small great photos in it. Most probably displaying some of the interesting things about Tunisia.

I was not surprised when I received the postcard. As usual it was adressed to MAK & FAMILY. Sounds Chinese...? Well...let it be. I am the "Mak"....She usually sends one postcard whenever she went somewhere. I will keep them in an album as a memoir.

What instantly strikes my mind is why did the postcard came so late. A month late judging by the postal chop. Was it the postal blunder, backlog or.....or is email and internet has taken over the job of relaying news. While I do not deny the efficiency of the internet, I will always feel very nice and happy whenever I received a mail, a postcard with good news of course...!

I personally feel that postcards is are things of the past since they are hard to find and they are not up to date. I remembered the difficulty of finding one when I went to Thailand. When they are one of the usual things in bookstalls, they are scarce now.

I still like to see them even if they are a little expensive now. And I will buy them whenever I came across them in some of my travel.

By the way thank you for the Tunisie postcard. A nice one.

Just wish that it had never happened........

At a gathering in one of the neighbor's house there were a lot of hush hush. Since I normally avoid gossips, this one was really new to me.

"What? You really don't know?" asked one.

I shrugged. Yes....I don't know. Is this the latest gossip?

"You don't read the papers?"

Again. Oh I hate to read the papers nowadays. Full of rubbish. They're all
only good for the paper lama man....

"No wonder...."

Well......... I do not mind not knowing the latest gossip. I'd prefer not to know if it isn't something nice to hear.

"Hmm.....it happened about 2 weeks ago...bla...bla...bla..."

Oh...oh... how I was glad not to know.....but since now I knew, I feel saddened by the incident.

I don't know whether to feel sorry or angry....

kaleidoscope

When I decided to blog about two years ago I was not sure what I would get. Someone told to go on and write something, nobody cares as long as you do not abuse the principles of blogging.
Nobody really knows who you are unless you want to make yourself known....

Oooh? I never want to be popular. That is not what I want. I thought I want to share something, maybe some knowledge. So I end up with this Kaleidoscope. Sounds jargon? No...it was just a name that I remembered when my class decided to publish something. It was named Kaleidoscope. Then we worked hard to produce our first publication. Almost everybody contributed. Alas....that was the only one....no more 'cos after that everybody became busy with school, homeworks, and eventually our major exams. I never really stop writing, not professionally though....most left unfinished. Some I did sent to my college's weekly tabloid. It was fun when you write under pseudoname......

So Kaleidoscope to me never die a premature death. It is here with me....

When women gossip....

One of my colleague, Az asked one day, after we had finished our lunch.

"Is it true what I heard someone said...."

I knew she genuinely asked for an explanation not a denial from me.
I stared back at. I was just sitting there reading some nasty, horrible juicy news in a paper, a tabloid.

"What is true and what did you hear?" I retorted.

"Ooh...something about you..."

"Who said what?" I asked again.

She blushed, trying to look innocent. "From S*****. During the recent seminar....she said... I just listen."

Feeling angry, I snapped at her. "Oh that's what you people do during seminars? Gossiping? You never listen to what is being discussed in the seminar?"

She was taken aback at mt response. "I just listen to what she said...." she kind of retaliate...

"Goodness gracious.....do you people had nothing better to do?" I said slowly.

Az did not answer. She said she is sorry.

"There are a lot of other things to do, instead of gossiping, telling all sorts of stories. In the end we don't know what is true and what is not. They are better kept aside." I said.

Az agreed.

"Why don't we talk about how good someone's children are, how could we emulate them."

Az was quiet. I did not know whether she agreed with me or not. The question was left unanswered. I chose not to enlighten her query. I knew it will eventually travel very far.....far beyond your imagination. I let it rest at that and I never really care to react.

I was relieved that I had had my lunch. That kind of thing sure kill my appetite.....

I am a woman and I do not like to hear negative things about another woman. So I hope the others do....if you happen to hear some gossips(which of course, not necessarily true....) for God's sake never tell others even though she is your best friend....

You don't know what happen next....

When things go bad....

Inna lillahi wa inna Ilaihi raji'un...

A friend had just passed away. I knew about it two days after from another friend of mine. He was not a close friend but he had worked in the same office but in a different unit. He was hardworking, dedicated and full of energy. But working in HQ did not seem to suit him so he asked for a transfer. He was back to his old place, working with those who knew him well.

He was only 49, married with four kids, the youngest is just four years old. That was the extra information I get from another friend.

"How did he die?"

"He went with a friend for a morning coffee. He complained of chest pains and collapsed. Maybe he had a seizure or something like that. They sent him to hospital...well, that's it..."

A heart failure. Quite common these days.

"Life will have to go on...." I said.

"Yes...."

Yesterday I heard some bad news too. One of my neighbor had been warded in ICU.

I hope he make it through.

Now I feel that I should go for full medical check-up again.

Sigh...........

My friend...a friend in need is a friend indeed....

"It never occur to me ....that such thing could ever happen to me..." Often I hear a statement like that.
Well...who does? It is always the least expected. But it did happen.

"He is cheating behind my back..."
Most certainly....obviously....nobody will cheat in front of you. Somehow someone who cheats will always try not to let others know...

I remember that day.......


It was hot afternoon and it was Ramadhan. I was driving alone... cruising at just about 30 - 40 km/hr, looking for her. I had been doing that for weeks, almost a month now. I knew I could finally meet up with her one day. God willing....

I had been passing through the same rows of the same houses repeatedly day in day out. I just did not know where to go any more. The neighborhood seemed quite, perhaps they took their afternoon nap....or mostly might be still at work.

But that did not dampen my spirit.

I kept searching for her. I must not gave up hope. I only knew her name, her house but I had almost forgotten how she look like. Truly, I met her once. Yes, only once and that was a year ago.
no contact number, I did not feel it was necessary back then.

A few days earlier I went to her new temporarily rented house but it was empty. I didn't know whether it was her house...but she lived around there. No car in the driveway. All I got was some curious stares from her neighbors. I gave them a smile, get back to my old sedan and drove off.

That day was one of my lucky day. As I passed by her own house which was under major renovation, I saw a car. I thought it must be her car. I stopped and parked my car under a small tree quite a distance away. As I walked towards the house, I saw a woman coming out of the wide open gate and was about to unlock her car door.

"Amy...." I called out.

She startled and looked into my direction.

"Amy..."

"Yes....?"

"Oh thank God..." What a relief....

"Who are you....?"

I extended my hand. "We have met before...I don't know whether you remember me. I have been looking for you..." I said, ignoring her question. "Let's go somewhere. I want to talk to you....."

And I told her everything....just about everything.

"I don't care whether you believe me or not. But I believe in what I saw..." I sighed, holding back my tears. I remembered, it was the holy month. I should not be crying.

She looked dejected....sad and angry.

That was the beginning of a friendship and sharing the misfortune and agony. Many, many years had passed....the ugly feeling is still there, haunting me.

I know. I feel awful.

Astaghfirullah.....

terkenang kenang..

Rasanya dah lama aku memblog di sini secara serius.....Oleh kerana sekejap ada sekejap tidak...blog aku ni jadi tak advance...tawar hambar macam lauk tak bergaram...Well, I don't expect anything from this though....features di sini pun aku tak berapa mahir...hehehe....ini kerana percubaan aku nak upload foto satu masa dulu gagal...so I give up....Maybe I shouldn't give up too soon....or maybe I should find some other place to blabber....maybe I should stick to MP...even though MP has better features...but I still feel that feeling of loss....I miss something there...or someone? perhaps...
So I think I am the problem. I suffer from writer's bloc....uh...so bad aarr....

Never mind about that bloc....

Hari ini dah lebih seminggu berhariraya. Hari raya yang macam tak raya bagi aku. Penatnya tak usah cerita......dari mula nak bersiap raya...bab baju raya....bukan baju raya sendiri....yang itu aku tak kisah...nak fikirkan nak masak apa untuk hidangan pagi raya...lintang pukang kalut...
Meriahkah itu?

Macam mana orang kata meriahnya hari raya? Sebab banyak makanan, banyak open house, jumpa ramai orang, kawan, saudara mara? Dengar lagu-lagu raya...tengok cerita pasal raya...Itukah meriah?

Aku rasa aku sering juga berjumpa saudara mara....Kalau pada hari biasa orang yang sama itulah yang aku jumpa....hariraya pun orang itu juga yang dijengah. Kali ini aku terasa agak happy pada malam raya kerana ke rumah jiran, sama-sama bertakbir raya...

Allahu akbar...
Allahu akbar...
wa lillahilkhamd...

Sejak beberapa tahun ke belakang ini hari raya bukan sesuatu yang aku nantikan.....

kita yang selalu lupa

Kadang-kadang kita lupa. Lupa tentang banyak perkara. Lupa juga menandakan semakin banyak perkara yang kita perlu ingat. Ada kalanya lebih baik lupa, jika ianya sesuatu yang membuat kita amat sedih atau kecewa.

Namun jika ianya untuk kebaikan diri di masa akan datang, terutama yang melibatkan kesempurnaan akhirat yang kita cari, adalah lebih baik kita ingat.

Perkara yang amat mudah....

kita lupa mengucapkan terima kasih kepada ibu atau ayah kerana pengorbanan dan kasih sayang mereka...

.

kita lupa memohon ampun dan maaf atau memaafkan sebelum kita tidur....mana tahu kita tidak bangun lagi esok pagi...

kita lupa bahawa segala nikmat kesenangan yang kita perolehi itu bukannya atas usaha kita semata-mata...

Untuk menjadi seperti satu pohon yang sihat, rimbun dan mempunyai buah yang manis dan enak dimakan kita perlu mempunyai kekuatan fizikal dan sumber makanan yang baik....

Makanan rohani dan jasmani itulah yang akan membuat kita seperti yang ada sekarang ini...

rapuhkah dahan kita?

bolehkah orang lain berpaut pada dahan kita itu?

tumbang atau tercabutkah jika ada ribut datang melanda?

Itulah di antara persoalan yang perlu dijawab sendiri. Jika rimbun pohon itu membuatkan ramai orang boleh menumpang teduh, alangkah bagusnya perlindungan yang pernah kita berikan.

Jika apabila dilanda ribut, hanya ada beberapa ranting kecil yang patah dan daun yang gugur, kita masih boleh dikira sebagai kuat dan teguh. ini bermakna setiap kali ditimpa musibah kita masih tabah menghadapinya....

Janganlah lupa bahawa masih ramai orang yang kurang bernasib baik dari diri kita....

semuanya dengan izin Allah juga....

bahasa

Beberapa episod lalu aku ada menulis pasal bahasa. Aku suka bab bahasa ni. Tak kira bahasa apa, janji ianya memberi aku ilmu yang baik. Bukan bahasa yang kurang ajar...

Tak ada siapa pun di dalam dunia ni yang suka kalau ada orang buat kurang ajar, baik dari segi pertuturan atau tingkah laku.....eh...tak betul ke?...Kalau suka, memang orang itupun jenis yang kurang ajar....

Bahasa sains dan mathematik yang diilhamkan oleh DR M. Ianya menimbulkan suasana huru hara di dalam kelas di luar bandar. Aku pun dulu sekolah melayu...lepas tu ngaji sekolah orang putih...tapi aku rasa aku tidaklah kalut sangat. Jadi mengapa mesti belajar bahasa orang putih tu hanya untuk sains dan maths sahaja?

Aku rasa guru2 aku dulu sangat dedicated...ada kelas tambahan BI lepas waktu sekolah biasa, aku tak bayar 1 sen pun... dia tetap bagi ilmu...aku ingat kamus oxford menjadi teman baik, mesti sentiasa ada bersama, kalau terlupa bawak alamat menggelabah....setahun saja yang jadi macam tu....lepas tu bila telinga tu mendengar dalam BI, masuk dalam komputer di kepala pun dalam BI, keluar dari mulut pun dalam BI....tak ada masalah...sesekali menyemak ejaan di kamus tu biasala.....

Kemudian suasana berBI tu dah biasa....sehingga aku bekerja dan mula mendengar dalam BM pula, menyimpan dalam komputer di kepala dalam BM, menyebut dalam BM dan menulis dalam BM. Memang sedikit terganggu bab menyebut bahsa sains, ekonomi. Lucu pun ada dan kadang-kadang amat panjang....kerana untuk memberi maksud sehampir mungkin terpaksa menggabungkan 2 perkataan....seperti...suaikenal, angkubah, susutnilai dan macam-macam...

Aku rasa lega apabila PPSMI itu dimansuhkan. Cuma adalah beberapa orang yang rasa dia dah mahir dan tak mahu nak berubah?
Kenapa?
Takutkah dengan cabaran?...

rasa sedih.....

Sejak akhir-akhir ini, aku seperti rasa terpinggir. Mungkin perasaan ku saja, tapi ianya amat mengesan dalam hati. Aku rindu padanya. Amat rindu...tapi dia seperti mahu mengelak dari aku. Itu yang buat aku kecewa dan sedih...
Aku cuba menggembirakan dirinya, tapi nampaknya aku tersisih...entahlah...
Mahu menangis aku di kala ini.....
amat sedih dan.....

Al-Aqsa Mosque Conspiracy !

the real al-Aqsa and the dome of rock

Al-Aqsa Mosque Conspiracy !

the real al-Aqsa and the dome of rock